I'm a large hairy woman, who enjoys long walks on the beach.

I refuse to post to this blog despite the urgings of my friends and perhaps my relatives. It has been suggested that I probably just don't have nothing positive or even mildly interesting to add to the blogosphere, but as my good friend Patrick has told me that doesn't keep 99% of the blogger community from posting so why should it me? Patrick has many sage hints and pieces of advice of me that he is only too happy to share. Plus he is so interested in the education of simpletons that he'll often phrase his immense knowledge in short catch phrases. For instance when our friend J-mac complained the other day about the possiblity of burning his lily-white Scotch-Irish hide at the beach, Patrick merely shouted out that J-mac needed to "Burn the Toast!" We're not sure what he meant by that. I'm sure that shit was deep though.

He's also incredibly handsome.

And fucking suave as hell.