I need $40 million and stat
Seriously. Anybody want to help me out? It's for a good cause, I promise. And it's gonna make us mucho rich, on top of which we'll be credited with doing a VERY important service to the fastest growing minority population in the US.
What do you say? Wanna help me buy Univision?
The $40 mil pricetag may be a little steep - I think we could bring it down to $35, just let me do the talking. After all, I'm one of them.
Why buy Univision? Couple of reasons, the main one being that it - combined with the smaller Telemundo - is making my people dumber by the viewing minute. And that pisses me off.
Tits, ass, puppets, stupid game shows, ridiculous soaps, grown men in diapers and sensationalistic news that makes Fox seem subdued - that's pretty much Spanish-language TV. That's it. There isn't one worthwhile hour of programming out there. It's cheap. It's crap. And it's insulting.
These networks could not possibly set the bar much lower. Imagine if NBC ran nothing but Fear Factor and Who Wants to Screw My Sister over and over and over again, with a little O'Reilly thrown in for flavor. Would you think that NBC regards you as an intelligent, ambitious human being? Or the lowest common denominator of life?
I'm brown and proud, though I admit I've been a little whitewashed by growing up in rural North Carolina. I can't salsa worth a damn. I have no Latin charm to speak of. And I don't have a Peruvian accent - or, for that matter, a southern one.
I am hispanic. Maybe that makes me a little more sensitive to being talked down to or patronized, who knows. But when I see the kind of programming my networks think I deserve, it makes me want to punch a wall, a network exec or both.
Where are the Spanish equivalents of West Wing and The Shield? Hell, I'll even take a CSI or a Smallville. Anything, anything at all, that entertains and challenges me the slightest bit and aims just millimeters higher than the bar.
I realize it's a generational thing, that folks my parents' age and older are used to seeing crap on TV because that's what Latin American TV thrives on, but this is the UNITED STATES, the supposed beacon of culture. Yeah, sure, that's bullshit, but maybe just this once it doesn't have to be. Maybe the Spanish networks can stop calling their audiences idiots to their faces.
That's why we're buying Univision: to raise the bar for millions who deserve much, much more.
Who's in?
-TM
What do you say? Wanna help me buy Univision?
The $40 mil pricetag may be a little steep - I think we could bring it down to $35, just let me do the talking. After all, I'm one of them.
Why buy Univision? Couple of reasons, the main one being that it - combined with the smaller Telemundo - is making my people dumber by the viewing minute. And that pisses me off.
Tits, ass, puppets, stupid game shows, ridiculous soaps, grown men in diapers and sensationalistic news that makes Fox seem subdued - that's pretty much Spanish-language TV. That's it. There isn't one worthwhile hour of programming out there. It's cheap. It's crap. And it's insulting.
These networks could not possibly set the bar much lower. Imagine if NBC ran nothing but Fear Factor and Who Wants to Screw My Sister over and over and over again, with a little O'Reilly thrown in for flavor. Would you think that NBC regards you as an intelligent, ambitious human being? Or the lowest common denominator of life?
I'm brown and proud, though I admit I've been a little whitewashed by growing up in rural North Carolina. I can't salsa worth a damn. I have no Latin charm to speak of. And I don't have a Peruvian accent - or, for that matter, a southern one.
I am hispanic. Maybe that makes me a little more sensitive to being talked down to or patronized, who knows. But when I see the kind of programming my networks think I deserve, it makes me want to punch a wall, a network exec or both.
Where are the Spanish equivalents of West Wing and The Shield? Hell, I'll even take a CSI or a Smallville. Anything, anything at all, that entertains and challenges me the slightest bit and aims just millimeters higher than the bar.
I realize it's a generational thing, that folks my parents' age and older are used to seeing crap on TV because that's what Latin American TV thrives on, but this is the UNITED STATES, the supposed beacon of culture. Yeah, sure, that's bullshit, but maybe just this once it doesn't have to be. Maybe the Spanish networks can stop calling their audiences idiots to their faces.
That's why we're buying Univision: to raise the bar for millions who deserve much, much more.
Who's in?
-TM
posted by The Tin Man | 2/22/2006
2 Comments:
I'd be willing to max out one of my credit cards for that...
Plus, I've noticed some of those Univision chiquitas are hot as hell...
And yes, sometimes I do just switch to Univision to check out the hotties...
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